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Roger Soh Cai Xiang
21
Nanyang Technological University
DOB: 051188

Trying to be a Godly Man

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Tuesday, June 27, 2006

today is the maths exam and and for the following few days there are many more..

i fear... my hands are trembling...

i have a fren who thinks blogging is totally useless and believe me i start to believe it in some ways too..

he says that wat for u type everything in ur blog and let every one noe what u are thinking and noe ur inner self.. some way he is like refering as losing ur privacy to the society or smth like that... i call being stripped naked and show it to everyone.. thats wat blog is...

therefore, he closed his blog... poor guy...

well, for me i juz use it to exerciase my fingers and drain out my mind.. felt great though...

my mum told me: If spiderman lost his powers and got it back, why cant u?
i told mum: i will...

Stupid at 3:56 PM

Friday, June 23, 2006

this is the end of the NML series.. so oh well bad to all blogging...

duno wat happen recently.. every one stopped blogging... even MC, the only blog that i read everytime i go online cause she is the regular updater... she stops updating.. and that curious me a little...

so basically, i juz watched the movie from tv bout wat women wants... then i kinda dun understand the movie.. neither my dad... well.. guess we are guys after all...

so wat happen is my mum becomes our medium btw man and women.. and she says that the movie is trying to tell us that no matter whoever is the women, strong independent women or timid and small, women have a soft spot for all things... and me and my dad was like.. WHAT? cant imagine our school librarian having a soft spot... but again maybe it is kept well hidden...

Is this true that all women have a soft spot? i dunno... wat do u guys say?

so what happen is that my mum some how gave me a tip also in dating... she says if u are like chasing a girl u are after, try to read her mind... well, no wonder professor xavier have girls even though he is in a wheelchair... the she said once u read her mind, u noe what she wants then give her wat she wants... then i came to ask dad whether that was the way he woo mum.. then he started that motorcycle story again... so somehow.. my dad got lucky without using that formula my mum gave me...

hmmm.. read her mind... tell ya the truth, i dun really understand her...oh well... i dun think i even have chance to get close to her alone...

ok.. so this is the BIG question for u girls out there... what do u think is the most important to u? love, guys, family, money, anything.. juz tag it k?

meanwhile... i tell u even though exams like 3 days away.. text looks like greek...

Stupid at 8:39 PM


Stupid at 8:39 PM

Monday, June 19, 2006

i went to watched cars with wensley RJ and keng loong today... and i loved the movie... guess rest of the guys didnt love it as much as i do cause they find it a bit too kiddish.. but i still love it...

i find the message they are trying to send across is very significant.. the movie is trying to say that 'winning aint everything.., helping pple out to complete the race is the thing which is the most important' well of course there are other moral to be learnt from there... oh.. and i love mater... he so funny... hahha..

sometimes even if u win u felt like there is no one by urside celebrating with u.. thats wat happen to that cheaterbug chick... and i should be rather familiar with that too.. and there are so many things to think about after watching the movie...

love the songs in the movie.. maybe ill get my hands on one of the soundtrack trm...

so.. trms showing: silent hill.. gosh.. yeah i hate horror.. but if i dun go they will say i pang sei again.. ck and mel and sted lor... but i cant go popcorn pop to get the posters...

found out i dunno alot about chem today.. must revise everything again.. and trms maths.. crap...

sigh.. took a long walk back home cause the hair salon aintopen.. then i walked slowly and thought bout stuff.. and found out that sometimes things should be left avoided, and left unassumed... get away from fustrating situations and u get a fantasy world... not unless it drags u back down again... deep idealogy upthere... oh well...

so, soccer craze is still on and my hand itch on betting and earning $... KA CHING!... Anybody?

Stupid at 4:42 PM

Thursday, June 15, 2006

i feel great today.. finally got everything sort out.. understand wat's the problem and im starting to solve it... further more.. there is an additonal bonus in my life... i felt great!!!

finally eveything is moving again.. the air.. the breath the water.... the taste of life is finally right...

but then.. yet.. the exams are coming.. so i still yet have work to do..

cant wait for u to come back from malacca.. have a lot of things to tell...

i understand that someimes in life.. all u have to do is make decisions and take the path wihich is right but hard.. instead of avoiding it.. and i think im walking down the path soon...

abstinece period is finally over.. time for me to open out again...

hope we could watch superman returns together...

p.s : heard that superman is damn kool show.. i will not miss the world for it..

Stupid at 9:32 PM


Stupid at 9:32 PM

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

im very very pleased with myself yesterday... finally can pul 4 pull ups.. that means a silver for me.. but i still wanna aim for gold and not to be left out by the guys in my class..

my theoretical work is almost done.. but all the qustions haven do.. so guess thats the time table for next week...

the drive of the engine is almost stopping... guess i need a reboost...

and im glad that this week i have the advantage of being alone.. feels great...

finally i get to rest this friday.. wonder wat i should do then...

everyone is talking bout the world cup.. like i said.. its nothing but just like singapore idol... reality tv.. i could only got entertainment out of it thru betting...

i still got this tingling feeling that i still aint working hard enough... must pull everything out of me then go to the extreme.. then i would be satisfied...

but i still do love watching animated series ut of you tube.. there's batman, superman, justice league.. spongebob.. anything.. amazing...

decided that im going town one day to buy the justice league dvd series.. and also detour to esplanade to get mc's advent children poster...

Stupid at 11:38 AM

Saturday, June 10, 2006

things goin into a forceful pace.. and im becoming sicker everyday cause my body is rejecting wat my mind is doing... study... grr.... so im splitting into 2... maybe next time u see me is my body.. without my brain.. all my brain only... lol... u noe.. like the ninja tutle the bad guy... wats the name? i dunoo.. aiya... digresss...

oh ya... yesterday nite... wat i wanted to say was i always thought that duno why i somehow always ended up with u.. perhaps its our destiny....

tats was a long long fren who stayed with me thru thick and thin... even though we are seperated...

ok.. so wat happen today was i woke up late.. watch jimmy neutron.. do some work not even half of it.. then now i am here.. typing.. playing.. hahah.. wat the...

i duno wats wrong with me this few days.. my eyes .. specifically my left eye... pricks always.. like got thing inside like that./.. rubbing for v long le but didnt help.. maybe im evolving.. then trm night that is red light come out of my eyes... then is optic blast then i turn into cyclops then i join th x men.. whoa...

aiya.. cant wait later got justice league..

Stupid at 11:04 AM

Thursday, June 08, 2006

yesterday conference with ck they all till 2. now still feel quite drowsy.. and there is alot to do today if i work according as plan...

i juz saw christine's blog and i see how she became a model and cope with studies at the same time.. and now she is like attending big stuff like seminars and stuff...

to be frank... i always wanted to be somthing big.. like attending meetings, seminars and stuff... gives the aura of authority or somethings like that... but then, i nv really pusued it seriously... once i tot of joining the council... but then im afraid that i couldnt cope with the studies.. now im not in it, i spent my time lazing around, which make me cannot cope with my sutudies either.. wats the diff?

the only thing that can fully develop me now is my archery... but i have to train myself to be better, and not to give up so easily... i wanna beat that glen... the sight of him demoralises me, yet fuel my will to challenge.. and i swear one day i'll thrash him... in everything...

but now.. im must find back that discipline i used to have to force myself to work.. work hard.. so i can completely get into the groove of improving.. like uncle ben said... this are the years when a man changes into the man he is the rest of his life... and i dun wanna laze around for the rest of my life...

but first i wanna go you tube and watch spongebob... tata!!

Stupid at 8:49 AM

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

i recently got news that yvonne left for mongolia... and she bid farewell to everyone, except.. me...

kinda sad sctually la... she forgot me... booo hoo...

but cant blame her anyway... eversince i got into S21, there is a part of the link missing in my friendship with them... maybe i nv meet them often or smth like that... damn sad... hope she's doing well there...

ok, the planning have been good and ive been trying to follow it constantly.. and try not to give up on the way.. cause if i do, it will be v diff to pick it back up again... so i kept the ball rolling..

i also gave archery one more chanc and start to train and get my form back... perhaps when im ready then i will take part in the next competition..

ive gone into isolation this week so i can get things back in order.. and i think im doin a pretty good job i guess.. prob is.. i felt like i have no communication to the outside world watsoever for quite a period of time... and also, haven been exercising again.. so worries...

there's still alot of vcds borrowed from frens that i haven watch.. but dad restirct a movie a day.. so oh well...

spongebob episodes can be found on youtube and i am damn glad.. now i can watch spongebob anytime any where any how.. i love it.. dun forget justice league too...

thats all for today... gotta go eat some crabby patties..

Stupid at 8:38 AM

Monday, June 05, 2006

Finally, i initiated... im so happy ! ha ha!

Stupid at 8:47 PM

after many weeks of resting and slacking...im finally ready to start to clear the mess...

yesterday had nootka dinner at a v high class restaurant.. al decarte.. and i only eat carbonara... not everyone was enthusiastic as ever... and no everyone is here...

then went to hagen daaz to eat some steam boat looking ice cream.. now thats original cause i nv ate before.... not bad.. then in midle got some chocolate and strawberry fudge thing// if i am eating alone.. i will eat the fudge directly man...

went to popcorn pop at esplanade... and saw this ff7 poster before we went to dinner... actually wanted to buy for mc, but then afraid that the poster will be damaged along the way... so called of the idea.... maybe i'll go down there some other day...

ok... thats all.. gtg to clear up some stuff

Stupid at 7:51 AM


Stupid at 7:51 AM

Friday, June 02, 2006

its been exactly a week...

a week darn... and all the work i have doneso far can just be settled in one day if i want to.. but the inner demon in me is stopping me from being the true me.. and each day passes, it is harder to fight it...

ok.. here's another qoute from batman,the haunted night... this part v touching... u muz go read the book on how bruce have to sacrifice many things, his love life, his friends and business to become batman...

" I thought that I didnt have a choice about being batman. That Gotham City chose me to protect her. that is wrong. ever since the night my parents were taken from me, I made the choice. It means that some of my hearts desire may go unfulfilled. But many more are satisfied."

I guess that applies to many of us to, especially people like me, who are unwilling to scarifice the comfort of laziness for the pain of greater good... guess all of us have a inner demon to fight, always..

Stupid at 12:18 PM

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